#SolutionFocusedCoaching
Why I love coaching
From the mountain to the sea,
No matter how bad the weather is
Coaching will forever be my solution
In June 2019 I was going to have 1 day of training in Cluj. The day after the training, individual coaching sessions were held with each of the participants. I had never done that before. I heard about coaching, of course. It seemed to me that everyone around me was a coach. You know, the story about the bubble we live in. The only thing I was connecting with coaching was a session I had been a client to some years ago. The only session. With a famous coach. The session convinced me that it was not an experience I would repeat. Interrogation, not coaching. Completely devoid of empathy, of humanity. You realize, I didn’t have a very good opinion about coaching as a process and outcome. From this position in regard to what coaching means, dear Gina, take up coaching with 10 people for 10 hours in a row.
It doesn’t seem like a good premise, does it?
It doesn’t.
I asked what I had to do. “Ask open questions.” Pfff, of course. Since it was going to happen in 2 days, I couldn’t do a fast training. So I went to improvise what I assumed coaching should be, with a personal touch of humanity added.
Surprise!
In fact, 10 surprises one after the other. I was a trainer for 11 years and only then I had the revelation of the effect of well-placed questions, addressed in a reliable setting. 10 hours have passed in flight. How did this happen? With every conversation, I saw the light in the eyes of the interlocutor. “The customer,” as they say. Which to me was a human. A person who wanted to live better with the decision he had to make. A person who wanted to be closer with his office colleagues. A person who wanted to communicate more calmly.
Starting with restraint, I came to see with delight how people found an answer, a solution, a way to act, or a step toward more clarity. You know I started to love coaching! I did a training. 4 modules. I would have done more, but that was all it took.
Petra Müller-Demary has been my guide in this process, I am deeply grateful to her for this. And here I started with restraint. No, that’s not how I usually am, that’s the beginning of my relationship with coaching. Let me explain: I have a training in therapy, packed with practice in this area.
You know that therapy is not like a walk in the park, it can often be similar to rafting on a raging river.
The coaching method, on the other hand, was Solution Focused Coaching. A walk in the park. Helping clients find the image of the solution – coaching conversations are built on this topic. I was wondering how it was possible that just by talking about the solution you could come to a solution, I simply couldn’t see it.
After more than 100 coaching sessions, I can now make a more comprehensive list of why I came to love coaching:
- It is a short process. In 2-3-5 sessions, the initial goal is achieved
- It is a pleasant process. The discussion is centered around what you want to do and what you hope to achieve – it’s a conversation that generates positive emotions
- It is for you. Time devoted to you, exploring, wondering, you are free to say what comes to you
- It’s the equivalent of good brainstorming: You get ideas, not all serious ones. Many solutions you can put into practice
- It is a performance accelerator. You forgive me for using big words, but it really is. Once you have set a goal, achieved it, and see why you are capable of it, the next goal will be the one thing you dare only dream about
- It is a solid brick added to self-esteem
Here are some questions you will probably hear in a coaching session::
- What is the best thing that can happen in your situation?
- What do you wish to achieve?
- What are some benefits you will notice when you achieve what you want?
Do not take my word for it. Please do not.
Try it.
If you have the chance to interact with a coach tailored to your heart, tell us how it was.
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